Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Downside of being a working mom, volume #1

When your kids get sick, and are miserable, it sucks when you have to go to work.

We were lucky today that my DH had the day off, so he could stay home with our son.

It is hard hugging them when they are crying because they feel like crap, and you know you have to leave and you have rubbed them with Vicks vapour rub and applied all home treatments that you can but your magic wand is out of juice. You still have to go to work and you know they are in the best hands they can be. They frankly don't understand or care you have to go to that work place.  They don't have to care at their age, but it is a kind of hurt when you have to hug them, and love them, and put on your professional face and leave.

Leaving isn't easy.  We don't always talk about that, except in the sense of 'leaving' someone in a relationship.  What about all those little moments, every day when we are in an act of leaving? Those moments you drop them off at daycare, and their faces crumble.  Those moments they really just want to stay home, and you tell them they have to go to school, "it is good for them".  All the while knowing you would just love to play hookey as well and just have a fun day.

It is equally tough when you have very little vacation time to use to cover your kids' sick days, and then when they happen, the shuffle that has to take place, and the work you know that is waiting for you. Sometimes know you not being there is going to cause issues for your coworkers. It is nice to have vacation days for a vacation and not to cover daycare, sick days, and appointments.

It is a tricky balance - multiple responsibilities, being present both as a mom, and as an employee, then as a spouse, a friend, a daughter, a coworker.  Maybe even being present for ourselves.

Now this is a strange ramble.  Moments like this build character for all of us (in the rose coloured glasses sense of the world) and it makes me appreciate that sometimes the best thing that you can do is get off of the routine, no matter how important it is most of the time. It is also important when your kids are truly sick to not be at work (which we do, no questions ask when it is serious). This almost sounds like whining, but it is also the way it is. Sometimes it helps to acknowledge those moments, and then you ultimately move on.  Usually with a hug and kiss and you do the best you can.

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