I am sitting here, catching up on computer related tasks. Everyone else is asleep, and the fish tank is humming along in the background. My cat is curled up on my lap, and every now and then I need to shift positions and he is not all that happy that I have disturbed his sleep. He is mostly a lovely cat. Like all cats, he has his moments. Especially in the last few years since he found his voice, which I would prefer he would lose again (ha).
This has been a week of pulling back and trying to refocus. The last two weeks have passed by in a typical blur - with a few truly lovely moments thrown in for good measure. My 40th wasn't quite what I expected. That being said, I spent a lovely day with my family at the aquarium, folks came for cake, and some friends at work spoiled me. I received some lovely cards from loved ones, and roses from my man. The stuff that matters. Having a big party wasn't a huge priority this year. I was talking to my sister from another mister and she remembered her 30th being like my 40th. Young kids impact your ability and desire to want to party. We almost had a few parties, but we bailed when we realized it was a great idea, but the execution of said parties just wasn't happening with the little free time that has been available. Maybe a random party in the summer, or better yet, smaller gatherings with groups of friends.
Work has been a completely different challenge these last six months. I have grown in ways I didn't see coming, and I am hoping that I am becoming a decent manager/supervisor along the way, but also learning how to manage myself better and uncover/deal with some of my own weaknesses as well.
Tonight has been important to have some moments to catch up on a few book posts, to hang with the cat, to clear out some work emails (I know, not on work time but it will make my day so much better not having almost 100 emails in my in box when I come in). This week has too many plans. Physio appointment for B, track and field, book club, a concert on Thursday, birthday party Friday night if my energy holds out, parade/fire works on Saturday, and then I believe, on Sunday we may rest. No wait, laundry and planning for the week! The weeks truly do roll over quickly. I know someone without kids that is complaining how tired and overwhelmed they are - they aren't even living with their partner! Just wait... but not worth totally popping their bubble.. enjoy the space you are in... the part that continues to surprise me is how much personal management and routines mean.
Speaking of routines, it is amazing how hard it can be to start a new routine. I want to start jogging, but it continues to be a concept, and an idea for me. I guess the more I talk about, the more I am getting comfortable with the idea, the closer it gets to becoming a reality. It is about making the space for it to happen. I attempted to take the kids with me on my first walk/jog on Sunday. That was also a learning experience. Sometimes it is better to just take the 40 minutes for yourself and not always try to "kill two birds with one stone". Between the complaining, and the bathroom needs, and then the I don't want to do this, to I don't want to go home... it wasn't exactly a first time out, and we did get out for some fresh air and exercise so we accomplished "something".
First step- taking my lunch walk again tomorrow. Getting back to routines, and mapping out new ones.
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