Likely, I should be asleep right now.

I was tired a few hours ago, and then Conner sneaked over to my side of the bed and climbed in, shaking me from the really good book that I am reading now (Cutting For Stone, a truly amazing book and one that will make my top 10 list for the year).  I thought about falling asleep, and then just couldn't seem to fall over that cliff.  Therefore, I am frittering away some time - budgeting, checking out new computers, checking out cell phone plans, and just wondering where all our money goes.  It seems like the more you make, the more you spend.  One of life's simple truths, much like nature abhors a vacuum, it also abhors money in the bank, that money is meant to be moving. 

I wish I could pinpoint what was up with January and February and why things seemed to go sideways in so many ways.  Our boys are doing well again - happier, making friends at school/daycare, and things appear more even keeled.  In time for the school year to end (OMG that was Grade 1), our morning routines are finally normalizing and we are getting out of the house at a better time, with a lot less yelling.   We have horseback riding, karate, and a run/throw/jump group going for Brandon, and I think that I need to get Connor going with some swimming lessons next.  I see skating for him in the fall.  Life is getting busier as they are getting older.  We were at the park last night for the track and field club, and just being out, smelling cut grass, watching people be active, I have missed this part of my life in the last few years.  When your kids are young and you work full-time, it is hard enough getting time to spend with your husband than be active.  I may be able to sneak in a few more walks!

It is all about getting in some kind of walk every day now.  Good for stress, hopefully good for my physique eventually!  As my 40th looms, I can't say I am having a midlife crisis (yet), but I would like to try Stand Up Paddling (SUP) this year, and another (gulp) 10km run towards the end of the year.  If I do it, I will run it at my pace.  I am so self conscious of being a "plodder", it is time to make my peace with a slow and steady pace (gets the job done right, all about the journey and not the destination, right???).

There are also moments I go back and forth whether or not I want to remain as chair on our childcare society.  The second year would be far easier than the first, and the experience is good, however, there is a but hanging in the air from our experiences in January/February.  *SIGH*.  Life never seems to be on a straight and narrow path.  I suspect I will see this through 2 years, and then retire from the board entirely at that point.  I will have felt like I have done my duty to the society, and ultimately, learned a fair bit along the way. 

I am grateful I do have rose coloured glasses perched off of the end of my nose perpetually and that I generally see the cup as half full.   It may be a bit idealistic, but it is a positive choice (hah).