Disposable

I was at the market the other day and got in to a conversation with the teller and a mom since I was packing my groceries in the built-in shelf in the stroller and we started talking about fridges and strollers.

We are fortunate enough to have Nej's stroller which has already seen the backsides of her 2 children. So this is child #3 to experience the joys of this stroller and it is still going strong. The mom in the line up made the comment that her stroller (which was a good one to begin with) didn't even make it through one child!! HOLY SHIT!!! Then we all related that fridges and cars are not meant to last anymore. They are built to be replaced every 5-7 years (or many of them are) to encourage consumerism. This rankles me. I guess I can handle the changing nature of technology and knowing that my 3 year old computer is already dated, or a cheap pair of shoes that barely lasts it's season, but it is another thing for a fridge, or a stroller, or a car to just be done that quickly.

First off, I had no idea I could care about these things. Amazing what joining the motherhood can do to change your attitudes. Secondly, WTF?! I get that children's clothes are almost rented because they truly do grow that fast, but you should be able to buy the bigger items and feel confident about being able to pay them forward within a reasonable amount of time. BLARGH.

Sleep

Sleep is never under-rated.

I can get away with a certain amount of sleep deprivation, but there reaches a point where I have crossed some magic line and the lack of decent sleep hits at a deeper level. Yesterday was one of those days. I could feel it in my edgier mood, the crankiness that crept up here and there, the lethargy, the lack of motivation, and just being ttttiiiirrrreeeeddd and unmotivated.

We switched back to our original formula and voila! Back to the Brandon we all know and love. Although it took forever and a day to get him to fall asleep. I was wondering for my sanity for a bit last night but at 11 his eyes closed and he welcomed slumber's embrace. He slept for 7 hours!!!! We got up a few times between 6-9am and I feel like a whole new person right now!!!

Back to feeling positive, and ready to tackle whatever life throws at me today.

AHHHHHHHHH. Nothing like getting a decent night's sleep!!!!

Greaser Babies

This is a catchy tune - summer loving, infant style!!

That stroller would be a bit of an upgrade, but I think the Don would be stylin and profilin in one of those leather jackets!!!!

Wild Kingdom

Heard a funny noise in the backyard and with joining our two cats, we watched a mum racoon and 4 kits playing in our backyard. They play-fought as siblings do, climbed up and down the trees, stared in at us, staring back at them, and all four babies tried out our water fountain. We threw them a few apples from the tree, and perhaps that wasn't the best call since the apples didn't last that long. This would also explain the large pile of excrement in the backyard I chose to mow around yesterday.

What a fabulous weekend. I called it a "date" weekend since it has been forever. Ken played hockey late friday which was nice because it gave us a chance to have an early dinner together. Saturday we both did some puttering, I did yard work and Ken grabbed some mussels and salmon for a dinner feast. I lucked out with a man that can cook up a storm and take some culinary risks that wouldn't even blip on my radar! A few vids, Brandon cat napped here and there, and va-voom. Sunday rolls around.

I grabbed my mom and took off for a few hours stateside to do some shopping. See, I had a 40% off your entire shopping excursion at one of my fav stores and well, it was a one day thing and I couldn't ignore the siren call of new clothes. I really haven't bought many this year (thank you Sarah for the help with the maternity clothes) so I felt like a big kid in a candystore today.

I needed pants.

I scored some really cool pants.

I needed new tops. I scored two nice knit tops. I also have my eye on a few more on this side of the border. Once again, the colours that are in this year suit me. Some seasons, not so much.

Got gas. Bought cheese (such a cross border shopper there) and discovered we made it through the border with mere minutes to spare before an incident snarled them all up heading northbound. We had lucky stars shining in our corners!!!

Voila. Here we are. Had a great "date" weekend, my son is two months old today, and I have some great new duds. Brandon was fussy as hell tonight, but he peacefully sleeps now and that is all but forgotten (kind of like rain here on the coast once it is sunny out). Was good for charging my batteries. Not sure if it was the great dinner and spending time with my guys yesterday, the shopping or just heading out for a bit of a road trip in the car. Prolly a combination of the three or four to perk up my positivity again.

Yankee Weathercasters

To steal an idea from Nej, I must admit that those american drug ads are scary. The side effects that they skim and rush through are almost worse than the ailment they set out to cure. Our news isn't always much better (news is generally depressing and employs scare tactics) but there are always a few "feel good" stories sprinkled through to make it more palatable. Is this a west coast thing or a canadian thing though, seeing as I don't live out East, nor have I ever. This is a totally different topic however.

One thing that provides me nothing but endless amusement about the news down south are the Weather 'Casters. I love that they send their weather folks out in to all kinds of weather. For some reason this tickles my funny bone, and I am compelled to watch these folks get blown around, rained on, caught in terrifying storms, buffeted by strong winds and nasty waves. This is great TV. Much better than watching our guys with hawaiian shirts (not that there is anything wrong with a great loud shirt) pontificating about our weather from behind closed doors. Ok, I am generalizing here but our guys don't often have to bare the inclement weather and perhaps they could do a little more of that, makes for a more interesting weather forecast in my books.

Timing

Brandon has this whole diaper changing thing down to an art form. Not only does he grace each new diaper with a fart, but the last few days, as soon as I have put a clean diaper on him, that is when he decides it is time to drop his load off. We are talking mere minutes later. Last night I went upstairs to do a load of wash, I had just changed his diaper, by the time the load was in the dryer and I had said hey to my folks, the deed was done and my eyes were watering. Unreal. Kid has timing like the rest of us!

Thanks to my aunt, we got a ****smoking**** deal on some new pots. Very shiny and pretty (who knew I could find a pot set gorgeous?) and now I have to figure out where to put them. Hence, the sorting continues. This has been the year of reinventing ourselves, getting some amazing new stuff, and letting go of the old. And the clutter. I can't get over how much cleaner all the way around things look when there is less clutter. In a sense, also how relieved I am to have more space opened up and not crammed full of things that I don't always need, want, or use. It is a different kind of awakening.

I am tired of so many of my old clothes too. The reinvention goes right in to my closet and I need new pants and casual tops. I have the blouse down to a fine art, but when I am not in the mood to wear a blouse, I don't really have a lot of other options because the blouse is a tried and true part of my wardrobe. Especially the white blouse. The easiest to match, the easiest to put on, especially since I drink my coffees on the couch and not on the way to work. Not that I am working right now but you catch my drift. I have so many pieces of clothing that I bought because they fit, not always because I really liked them or because I felt that they looked good on me. I also have a lot of really man-ish shoes. I love my docs and blundstones, but would be nice to have a more feminine pair of boots for a change. Egads. Who knew pregnancy and childbirth would really awaken the inner goddess in me?

With these new ideas for me also comes the desire to trim up a bit, which for me is always easier to plan than to execute. That said, I have some goals, and am trying to get in walks and my yoga tapes and then we will see what else I can get up to this year. I think this phase is all about Brandon and me, and also getting our house together on these new terms. Once our house is together, and Brandon is well on his was to toddler-hood, I think I can concentrate more on just getting fitter and firmer.

Now a long rambling post like this is the byproduct of not having the same amount of free time to post. Brandon sleeps, which brings on a frenzy of little bits and pieces of things that I want to get done....

The rains have come

The sun has officially been banished behind the Wet Coast clouds, hopefully to peek out on more than one occaison before spring! In honor of the change in weather, I decided that today was a great day to make a stew. I love barley, and there is nothing like the smell of a good stew permeating the house. I usually add a can of guinness, but not having any of the good stout, I went for a bud, which seems to have done the trick!

Brandon is officially outgrowing his first set of clothes. This gives me a funny feeling inside because the growth and changes are as official as they can get now that he has clothes that are too small. In the last two weeks he has changed a lot. He isn't the wee infant he was, he is growing in to his face, and stretching out, and developing some baby rolls. Smile rewards are priceless, and I can't help but smile and coo back at my wee boy.

Being at home more, I am continuing the clearing of the clutter. I thought I had already gone through stuff, but it appears I am more than ready to let go of things that collect dust, or items of clothing I might wear, and paying forward the pocket books I have already read. I also have an overwhelming urge to paint. You can also call the clutter clearing "baby proofing" but in a sense it is a transition from what I used to think looked cool to what I think looks cool now. The piles of rocks are moved from the windowsills and adorn my plants, and the now vacant nooks and crannies are getting dusted for the first time in a lonnnnnnnng time.

It is a strange stage to be in - Brandon isn't all that active yet, and I hope I am doing enough to entertain him and stimulate motor and language development. At times I think it is like the battle of my ego, letting go of doing all the things during the day that I want to and just giving my complete attention to his needs. I am not always chatty, I don't always put on a CD, sometimes I feed and read, other times my mind is set adrift, other times I am just gazing in to his eyes with a sense of wonder. It is a whole new rhythm and at times I feel a bit off balance, not sure what the new measure of my day looks like.

Fall bounty

Well, my garden may not be as robust as I had hoped, but our apple tree is bursting at the seems with some fabulous tasting spartan-esque type fruit. Our rosemary, oregano, chives, and basil have kicked butt, however the lettuce and tomatoes fell victim to the summer drought and childbirthing activities...on my list of things to do today.. one would be to pick the apples before they all land on the ground. Said apples may be part of the reason we have had the wild kingdom happening in our backyard for the last few weeks...

The weather is definitely starting to turn. Summer is drawing to a close and you can feel it in the air in the mornings. I love fall - as the trees begin to change and colours abound.

Cheese Cake

When the mood strikes, I love cheesecake.

I believe in our wooing stage, Ken brought me a fancy-schmancy cheese cake his talented sibling had made and it sure did go a long way to ...

Then last year, my mom asked me what kind of cake I wanted for my birthday and I figured once in your 30's you may as well "go big or go home" with the birthday cakes and I requested a NY style cheese cake. Well, my mom was on one of her diet forays and was checking out the South Beach diet. Please note, I was not. I ended up with the SB diet cheesecake. With whipping cream lathered on the whole damn thing. I can still recall that consistency and I can feel myself cringe from the memory. Needless to say, I didn't finish my piece and refused to make any comments about it, at all. With my face, I am sure that my disappointment was telegraphed clear across the province.

So, for a dinner on saturday night, which involved great friends, some wine, lots of seafood, I had a hankering for a cheesecake. After perusing a few reliable recipe sites, I settled on one that had over 800 - 5 star reviews. It was ridiculously easy, and I started it, Brandon woke up fussy, and with some verbal help, Ken finished it. We are a damn fine team because that cheesecake was damn fine is I must say so myself. Granted we have now shared as much as possible because no one needs 1/2 a cheesecake kicking around their house... just looking at the damn thing you can feel the calories thinking about coming on..

To make a long winding story short, I like cheesecake. A lot.

All over the place

Our backyard is a menangerie of birds, cats, racoons, black and gray squirrels and now, a few skunks. The other day brought both a woodpecker, and a stellar blue jay. Both of whom happen to be some of my favourite visitors. I didn't reckon that I was the kind of gal that would love to have a few bird feeders kicking around, but I am. I value the chirps, peeps, squawks, and all manner of grasses that now seem to grow in certain areas of my yard.

Speaking of wildlife, I think the world truly lost a bright and shining star when the Cr0codile Hunter passed on in that freak accident. His spirit, his will, and his vision. What can you say about such a champion of the wild and all it's creatures great and small except that a bright light was extinguished and thankfully he left behind a rich legacy in terms of his actions and the family that he created.

My ongoing cleaning and getting rid of items still has not come to a rest. I went through a few clothes drawers, finally letting go of some of the items I will never wear again. I was surprised by a few things that didn't fit - funny how that happens when you haven't worn something for 10 years!!!! I can't believe how much of a pack rat I can be. How quickly things start to accumulate, and then how much better I feel once I have tossed a bunch of items to just create some more space. In many ways, we outgrew our space when we moved in here. Then again, this space has meant I have let go of such many things I really didn't need anymore, things that it was high time to send on their way. I find I can't handle the clutter like I used to be able to, and I am seeing things through a different lens.

Speaking of which, I like TLC. They have some great "touchy-feely" programs through the day that are palatable and keep me away from the other channels. Then again, afternoon television makes me angry so I can't say the telly is on for that period of time anyways.

Been a while..

It feels strange this week to have a moment to sit in front of the computer. My surroundings feel like chaos as I am sure every new mother feels (hell, don't we all) on occaison.

Lots has happened in the last week, and not all of it easy to articulate.

The easy stuff - Brandon is now 10 pounds 5 ounces. With a huge sigh of relief for a mom that was worrying about her son's very slow weight gain we have turned a corner and he is now thriving as he should. Granted, we have made the decision to supplement, it wasn't easy, but it felt like the right decision once it was made and seeing such a wonderful increase in weight gain, affirmed it was the only way to go. Last night was his first hockey game watching dad in his exhibition games, and it was also the first time that he discovered his thumb!

For me, I am enjoying the benefits of Brandon getting better sleeps. The cards are all finally in the mail, so that is behind me. Or wait, was that more or less done last week? Oh, those were the wedding thank yous from March, now I am also caught up on the baby shower cards. I continue to have little lists so I can keep track of the things that are hanging on my radar to do...

Last weekend was also my first solo weekend. All in all, I did ok but I really missed having Ken around to bounce ideas off of, and to just talk things through with as decisions had to be made. On the other hand, I got out for a few walks, a successful shopping excursion or two (read new ginch and new feather pillows for our bed), and fish and chips at the beach with my aunt and cousin who were in from the island so that also doubled as some fun girlie time too. The days really did blitz by and now another week is almost done and I can't help but be a little relieved that Ken is home this weekend.

Our endless summer is amazing, even if I don't get out a lot in it. I am getting out for some walks, and it is surprising to contemplate how small your world becomes around birth, and then gradually it becomes bigger and bigger again as you get in to a routine, and your child begins to grow. It is also mind blowing how much socializing you do in the first 6 weeks so far of your child's life. It is great, but I am finding that at times I am feeling a little fried or talked out, or needing that quiet time during the day when everything is silent.